One of them is a doppelganger from a sinister place spreading fear and hatred and poisoning the world around them and the other is a character on the TV show Twin Peaks: The Return on Showtime. Try to guess whether each horrible act was perpetrated by out-of-control Russian puppet Ramzan Kadyrov, who rules Chechnya with brutal populism, or Evil Dale Cooper from Twin Peaks, who regularly murders people to serve some mysterious agenda. Click the heads to see the truth!

CooperKadyrov
Decapitated a US Air Force Major
Forced a teenage girl to marry a 50+ year old police chief
Encouraged the police to torture and kill homosexuals
Used his phone to turn on a prison's alarms and threaten the warden
Used his phone to find his missing kitten
Beat a man with a shovel handle and then killed him
Tortured people with live electric wires and shot a pistol at their feet
Tortured a woman with a creepy playing card and shot her through a pillow
Had actual little kids participate in brutal MMA fights
Had an actual little person participate in a brutal assassination

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

More Front Page News

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Pardon Our Dust

    Pardon Our Dust

    Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.

  • DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG

    Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind

Copyright ©2024 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful