There used to be an old saying about the Internet: "I signed up to complain about Star Trek, but I stayed for the free pornography." Well, the show has since been cancelled, but with a new movie coming just next year, it's time to begin living up to your obligations as an Internet person. Read this Star Trek refresher, then go look at some porn.
In an event that is sure to be remembered just as fondly as the first Star Trek convention, the indoor kids of the world went outside in full force on Sunday in protest against the Church of Scientology. Their efforts beg the thought: Can anyone really win the battle of Ridiculous vs. Ridiculouser? NetBeat and its loyal readers were on the scene.
You've been responsible for a terrible year, Internet, and your horrible fireworks show will reflect that. Enjoy your fat men.