The H.O.B.O. Shop, submitted by Mason. First off, let me admit that I find nothing more exciting than the prospect of wearing a shirt which reads "HOBO" in huge letters. I think hobos are the pillars of society, assuming all society is based around sleeping in boxcars and carrying all our possessions in a cloth sack tied to the end of a stick. With this is mind, I do not have any trouble supporting the growing hobo movement. To make things even better, HOBO is apparently an acronym for "Helping Our Brotha's Out." It has always been my goal to help "a brotha'" out. I'm not exactly sure what I'd help him out of, maybe a horrible car accident or perhaps a large empty cauldron, but regardless I am very interested in helping a "brotha'" out. That's definitely on the top of my to-do list. Unfortunately, I'm not sure if I'm a prime candidate for HOBO Wear, as it appears as if I'm white and therefore don't match their target demographic of "being black." Sorry all you "brotha's" out there who need help: I'm not a HOBO who can help by buying your clothing, but at least I can lend assistance by giving your website traffic!
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All Shoes $100.00
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Now I searched this site for a good 20 minutes / seconds or so, and I couldn't find anything anywhere detailing how exactly buying shitty clothes that cost 40 times what they're worth consists of "helping our brotha's out." I don't even know which brothas in question are being helped out; I assume it's the brotha' who is suckering his fellow brotha's into buying the most tackiest merchandise this site of Atlantis. I did spot a couple wiggy wiggy werd up whiteboys sporting some HOBO Wear in the men's section, so this only compounds the mystery! Please tell me King HOBO, which brothas would I be helping out if I were to suddenly drop $900 on a pair of HOBO shoes, HOBO pants, a HOBO shirt, HOBO hat, HOBO socks, HOBO cologne, a HOBO belt buckle, and a HOBO white trash mustache? I have no clue, but I do know that "we ain't havin it."
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