Grim&Evil Online, submitted by Cheryl. First off, let me warn you dear readers that this site is tremendously scary, like the one time I saw my naked ass in the mirror without wearing the protective goggles that my physicians prescribed for me. I have this unadulterated fear of animated gifs, particularly red spinning animated gifs which feature either a cartoon representation of Satan or perhaps some particularly snazzy lightning clipart taken from a free online animated image site. Additionally, wav files really scare me, as well as background pictures which are too blurry and incomprehensible to understand. With that out of the way, let me welcome you to "Grim&Evil Online," a website which bills itself as "the Greatest Website of all time." I don't want to oversell how utterly important and great this website is, but the page which reveals this uses TWO bullet points to write "Started Building the Greatest Website of all time." See, most people who are trying to create the greatest website of all time but actually know they are unable to create the true greatest website of all time will just use one bullet point to convey this message. Grim&Evil Online uses TWO. This is how you can tell they truly mean business.
One of the greatest challenges facing mankind is this site. On a dark winter's evening, about the turn of midnight, after a day of chatting, one person had a dream. He dreamt of conquering all the chat rooms by his wickedness. He has haunted all the chat rooms for four long years. In those years he is said to be the most diabolical person, a "Draculaea". No one was immune from his brutal whim; innocent chatters, noble chatters, even holy men who were usually revered. And one day he was influence to create a site for his channel, a site where demons can communicate. The Devil suggested to him in a dream that he should create the website to defy the Almighty's attempt to stop him.
All seems to have gone well. He began the operation on the 1st day of November and finished it on the 20th of December. As the torture mounted, the "naming of names," the implicating of others, became commonplace. Wars were endemic. Simple survival hung in such precarious balance that a single ruined harvest could condemn whole regions to pain.
Er, yeah, whatever he said. The point is that this site is grim, evil, Grim&Evil, the greatest website of all time, and just horribly scary. If you ever begin to doubt just how scary this website is, read that one page with the two bullet points and you'll soon remember. Please note that I never really explained the purpose of this website or why exactly it's the greatest website of all time. This is because I really don't know what the fuck is going on here and all the goddamn wav files and animated gifs made me close my browser faster than a hooker closing her browser because her pimp walked in and said, "yo bitch, close that browser!" I don't really know what the hell that analogy meant, so you can obviously see the effect of raw terror on my writing skills.
And you thought women had one-dimensional script intros that treated them like sex objects. Ewoks have it even worse.
No one seems to like the new Doom box art. But it's still the same old Doom Guy under that space marine helmet. Right?
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