NoRiders divides this homepage chart into two parts. One lists undesirable results (being self-conscious, annoyance, threat of gross upper thigh), while the other proposes happy alternatives (self-confidence, enjoyment, relatively modest display of ugly legs). Noticing that "buy now" was in the bad column, I opted for "watch video," thus experiencing a terrifying stop-motion animation sequence in which someone's crotch constricts into a tight asterisk.
As the 19th century diver approaches a giant clam, a flash of brilliant golden light flares from within the shell. I emerge in a swirl of bubbles and do the timeless universal underwater hand signals for the following: ZODIAC KILLER, KKK, BLOOD OF YOUTH
If you still have any difficulty transitioning to chip readers, please refer to the FAQ compiled from average user reactions.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.