Remember I-Doser? That trance-song shit that made your brain bug out? Well, hey, now it's free online through this wonderful little "square eater" website. Just like I-Doser, it offers all the magic of weird sounds making your head get all heavy or whatever, but square eater doesn't force you to spend money for this sensation like some sort of fucking idiot. And because it's free, I'm going to go ahead and try it out for you guys! I'm a little tired right now, so I'm going to take "Upper - short," which is a misnomer at 14:48, and provide you wonderful people with a trip report:
0:01 Just launched the square. It's just weird optical illusion shit. They said something about sounds, but I'm not hearing anything.
1:00 More of the same. Patterns are changing. I'm a little tired, actually. Going to turn off the lights in my room and restart it to see if that affects anything.
5:38 Restarted it, it has sound now, like someone wandering through a wind-chime farm. Slight headache above my right eye.
END: I have seen the end of the fucking universe, guys. Not like end, TIME, but like END LOCATION, you know? Did you guys ever read Hitchhiker's Guide? Good book. Great fucking book. Robot is fucking hilarious. End of the universe like that, with the restaurant. Staring off into nothing, man. Staring off into God's eyes. He looked back at me. Smiled. I say "he" but it's not like he's got a gender, man. He just is. Just saying he cuz you know, its easier. I gotta go tell my friends. This shit is amazing!
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.