Remember I-Doser? That trance-song shit that made your brain bug out? Well, hey, now it's free online through this wonderful little "square eater" website. Just like I-Doser, it offers all the magic of weird sounds making your head get all heavy or whatever, but square eater doesn't force you to spend money for this sensation like some sort of fucking idiot. And because it's free, I'm going to go ahead and try it out for you guys! I'm a little tired right now, so I'm going to take "Upper - short," which is a misnomer at 14:48, and provide you wonderful people with a trip report:
0:01 Just launched the square. It's just weird optical illusion shit. They said something about sounds, but I'm not hearing anything.
1:00 More of the same. Patterns are changing. I'm a little tired, actually. Going to turn off the lights in my room and restart it to see if that affects anything.
5:38 Restarted it, it has sound now, like someone wandering through a wind-chime farm. Slight headache above my right eye.
END: I have seen the end of the fucking universe, guys. Not like end, TIME, but like END LOCATION, you know? Did you guys ever read Hitchhiker's Guide? Good book. Great fucking book. Robot is fucking hilarious. End of the universe like that, with the restaurant. Staring off into nothing, man. Staring off into God's eyes. He looked back at me. Smiled. I say "he" but it's not like he's got a gender, man. He just is. Just saying he cuz you know, its easier. I gotta go tell my friends. This shit is amazing!
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.