"Thousand of woman have ghosts in their private area and don't know it," warns Haunted America Tours. This condition causes specter-infested crotches to glow and transmit "black energy." Uterus inhabitants include dead babies (probably stillborns who weren't properly placated with postmortem gifts) and deceased husbands, who live in constant fear of having their immortal spirits penetrated by some new dude's dick. Occasionally peni are commandeered as poltergeist flashlights, but usually males must deal with the daunting presence of the notoriously rude Bowel Ghost. If you're unsure whether your vaginal/anal misfortunes are due to malevolent phantoms or some less exotic culprit like venereal disease or colon cancer, follow this protocol: "Try passing an EMF Meter over your naked body. And recording EVP's by placing a digital voice recorder in your genital regions. You might be surprised at the results."
Game of Thrones has mercilessly killed off characters over the years, but these lesser characters are still waiting to meet their fate.
What movies other than Rat Race could be improved by the surprising entrance of Smash Mouth?
day 2: still working on the car
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.