Something Awful™ forum goon "Eustace Tilly" clearly subscribed to the "if you throw enough shit, some of it will stick" philosophy when he sent me this hodge-podge of an email. You may think you're a nobody, "Eustace Tilly", but today you are a big bright shining somebody. Semper fi.
FROM: Eustace Tilly
You've done a really great job with this so far, congratulations!
Here's a few links I've dug up that you might want to use in the next
fat kid eating cereal to chariots of fire
a shut-in with maracas trying to turn his shitty poem into a rap
confusing goth video about drugs and grandmothers or something?
I don't know if you give shout-outs to goons who send you these , but
I'm forum nobody Eustace Tilly if you're curious.
We leave you this week with a truly touching video. Recently, we celebrated the 6th anniversary of the attacks on 9/11. Since those horrible tragedies, people have dealt with the loss and grief and anger in various ways. Perhaps this video submitted by Drew Grant best sums up the feelings of our healing nation. God bless the USA™.
FROM: "drew grant"
A miming of 9/11
Thanks for tuning into this very special episode of AwfulVision™. We will return to our normal format next week, but until then, enjoy the best, worst, and most "Uhh...." inducing videos I've ever had submitted via email.
Speaking of which, if you would like to submit something via email, click this link and send it my way! Who knows, you just might see it on AwfulVision™ or perhaps made fun of in the next edition of the AwfulVision™ Mailbag™! Also, as usual, I'm going to plug our YouTube Channel™ where you can find most if not all of the videos from past updates. If you have never clicked a link on the internet, why not make your inaugural click one of the two from this paragraph!
Thanks to my pals who sent in videos this, and every week. Until next time, this is Seth "Occupy Japan" Bailey™ saying "I don't get paid nearly enough for the misery watching these videos causes me"!
2 PM: Steven J. accidentally drops his vintage Trapper Keeper, revealing erotic drawings of the ‘bunny girls’ emoji. The room draws silent. Slowly, member after member opens his/her notebooks and tablets, revealing dozens of pages of bunny girl emoji fanart. The room votes 12-0 never to speak of this again.
He was ripped off for True Detective, now Thomas Ligotti is being asked to review Pizza Hut's new Hotdog Pizza Bites.
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!