Like most of you, I went to highschool. Also like most of you, my highschool had "that girl". "That girl" was a fat, unwashed sack of shit who stunk to high heavens and wore sweatshirts with a picture of Tweety Bird-with-an-attitude-problem on them adorned with such phrases as "That's MS. Bitch to you!" and "I don't THINK so!" Invariably, these girls would always have some thinner, meeker, stringy-haired, methed-out looking counterpart who was equally as disgusting, making them rather like a trailer park version of Laurel and Hardy.
Msjackie69 was clearly "that girl" in highschool. I base my prognosis on the following ineffable facts:
Oh, also she's a racist but she's the kind that can't understand why in the world this could possibly be construed as racist (aka a Libertarian). And hell, even if it is, she's fat n' sassy and don't give no fuck!
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!