Piso Mojado

FutonForensic

Listen up, kittens! You will clean this bathroom to a perfect shine every day for the next three months! For this task, your only tool will be the latest Swiffer® WetJet®

my new dog

306 reporting 9 man 10 man total, private tensing found a wounded dove
Sgt: why is no one comforting him

HighwireAct

Chill Sergeant: War is hell. Now I don't know about you, privates, but hell's a little too hot for me, so I hope you boys packed your floaties, 'cause I'm deployin' us all the way to the water park! Don't touch that wallet, Pyle; it's my treat.

social vegan

recruit one: chill sargent caught me with an untucked shirt this morning

recruit two: oh god, what's the punishment

recruit one: he's making my whole platoon clean their entire mouths, with just this *holds up a toothbrush*

Macnult

"Atten-HUT!"

*everyone stands at attention*

"haha okay guys you can chill now."

*no one moves a muscle*

*sigh* "at ease."

mister magpie

Drill Sergeant: GET THE FUCK UP! GET UP! WAKE UP MAGGOTS! *throws garbage can down room* WAKE UP! 6 AM DOG WALKING CALL! GET THOSE ASSES UP AND THOSE PUPS ON LEASHES! WE NEED TO BE AT THE DOG PARK BY 5:45 SO WE CAN CHAT UP POTENTIAL NEW FRIENDS AND SEE ALL THE CUTE DOGS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD!

City of Glompton

Look to your left! Now look to your right! By the end of the year, one or more of these people will probably be your best friend! Any questions?

– David "g0m" Dolan (@g0m)

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