Mayor Wilkins here with another action-packed Goldmine. When you were younger, you loved those Choose Your Own Adventure books. Yeah, I know you did. I did, too.
Anyway, out of all those Choose Your Own Adventure books that were made, you know that some of them just didn't make the final cut. Forum member Jer decided to dig deep into the collective fetid imaginations of the forum goons this week to find out just what, in their minds, should have made it to the bookshelves. And from old women flashing people at Mardi Gras to conducting highly famous theoretical experiments, the goons came up with some...well. Something.
Enjoy this week's Comedy Goldmine - "Choose Your Own Adventure" Books That Never Quite Made It!
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.