When I told my niece what a swordfish is, she asked me if there are also sword-bunnies.
My brother-in-law was about 3 when my wife and I first started dating (she was 21 when he was born). One of my favorite things ever was when he just said out of the blue "Birdfeeders are like a McDonald's for birds."
the party god
Pilot to Gunner
Met a 4-year-old in the park today and she repeatedly told me she was from Manhattan in New York. So I asked her to tell me some things about the city.
In Manhattan, everyone is happy because they have two cars.
Except for the Hot Dog Man, he has one bicycle.
Every night he puts his hot dogs in the trees so the pigeons can't get them.
Not what I had in mind when I ordered an Italian gondolier. This is literally just a tiny toy. Needless to say, the Italian businessmen were not impressed and I looked like a damn fool. We lost the pizza pie account and will have to lay off half our factory.
Did you know that you only use 10% of your brain? You may have heard that before. But what if you could use 100%? YOU CAN!
Time to applaud the man who applauds in a loop until the end of time.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.