> reply "i'm gay"
> "i'm telling you my status idiot: i'm fucking GAY. i'm the gayest there is. over."
Toad on a Hat
> Tell the captain you already relieved yourself into the ocean and then fart into the radio
> escape into the welcoming arms of mother ocean
> kill the relief when it shows up and commandeer their transportation
> now is our chance to become pirates
> raid the survival locker on the raft for ship's biscuits and proceed to throw breadcrumbs at man, telling him what a nice ducky he is
> drive over him so that he gets chopped up by the propeller
it's the only way to be sure
> recruit him to your pirate gang
> now run this fucker over with your boat
> check the inventory of both boats
Transgressive author Chuck Palahniuk is here to help with tips and tricks to hacking your life.
Not what I had in mind when I ordered an Italian gondolier. This is literally just a tiny toy. Needless to say, the Italian businessmen were not impressed and I looked like a damn fool. We lost the pizza pie account and will have to lay off half our factory.
Time to applaud the man who applauds in a loop until the end of time.
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