Feranon

> reply "i'm gay"

Atma

Feranon

> "i'm telling you my status idiot: i'm fucking GAY. i'm the gayest there is. over."

Atma

Toad on a Hat

> Tell the captain you already relieved yourself into the ocean and then fart into the radio

Atma

SniperWoreConverse

> escape into the welcoming arms of mother ocean

NecroMonster

> kill the relief when it shows up and commandeer their transportation

The Droid

> now is our chance to become pirates

Atma

Missing Name

> raid the survival locker on the raft for ship's biscuits and proceed to throw breadcrumbs at man, telling him what a nice ducky he is

Feranon

> drive over him so that he gets chopped up by the propeller

it's the only way to be sure

The Droid

> recruit him to your pirate gang

Atma

NecroMonster

> now run this fucker over with your boat

Atma

THS

> check the inventory of both boats

Atma

More Comedy Goldmine

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.

  • Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'

Copyright ©2015 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.