> reply "i'm gay"
> "i'm telling you my status idiot: i'm fucking GAY. i'm the gayest there is. over."
Toad on a Hat
> Tell the captain you already relieved yourself into the ocean and then fart into the radio
> escape into the welcoming arms of mother ocean
> kill the relief when it shows up and commandeer their transportation
> now is our chance to become pirates
> raid the survival locker on the raft for ship's biscuits and proceed to throw breadcrumbs at man, telling him what a nice ducky he is
> drive over him so that he gets chopped up by the propeller
it's the only way to be sure
> recruit him to your pirate gang
> now run this fucker over with your boat
> check the inventory of both boats
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.