OPEN HOUSE

Thanks to Caylen "Abraham" Burroughs for covering for me this most recent Wednesday. In a mad exercise in idiocy, I have moved to San Jose, CA where I now live a few blocks from David Thorpe in an apartment previously occupied by DocEvil. Here's a brief incomplete summary of what DocEvil left behind:

  • A box containing 500 plastic forks. WAY TO RAPE THE ENVIRONMENT, DUDE.
  • A near empty box of wine.
  • A hat that says "It's my birthday and I'll cry if I want to!"
  • Three combs (David is going to boil them for me so I can use them again or sell them).

San Jose is not as pretty as Washington but on the plus side there are palm trees and it is far easier to sweat like a pig here. I wouldn't mind a few months of overcast skies and nonstop drizzle.

The Scientific Method with Tom "Moof" Davies

Moof: you know if you wanted to feed a dog some whisky people would get upset
Livestock: tom - we don't know that
Livestock: and not knowing is the basis for scientific discovery
Livestock: what i'm saying tom
Livestock: is we have to test
Livestock: to verify
Livestock: because it is not enough to simply state
Moof: how will we test
Livestock: maybe post a blog
Livestock: saying we are going to give a dog some whisky
Moof: hmm
Livestock: post pictures of ourselves with a bottle of whisky
Livestock: and then pictures of a dog
Moof: yes josh
Moof: lets do it
Livestock: and then maybe photos of the dog being fed whisky
Moof: yes
Moof: and the dog drinking the whisky
Livestock: but tom
Livestock: that is where science comes in
Livestock: the dog will be the control
Livestock: and the whisky will actually be ice tea
Moof: :O
Livestock: and we will drink the whisky
Moof: so we need another dog
Moof: wait
Moof: you cant make the dog the control and have us drink the whisky
Livestock: because we are the real test group and the dog is the control
Moof: you need another identical dog in an identical environment to drink the whisky
Livestock: what
Livestock: really
Moof: listen i think you just want to drink whisky
Livestock: tom where are we going to get two dogs
Moof: maybe a pound josh
Moof: or target
Livestock: oh okay
Moof: maybe down at the old train yard
Moof: find a couple of scrappers
Moof: some real characters
Moof: with torn ears and torn hearts
Moof: a sheen of regret distorting the faint hope that still glimmers in their eyes
Moof: faint, yes... but not gone... not yet...
Moof: maybe that is what we will do josh
Livestock: tom there is poetry in a sad dog's eyes
Livestock: the poetry of life
Moof: yes there is
Livestock: think i'm gonna need that whisky now
Moof: me too bro
Moof: me too

- Josh "Livestock" Boruff

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