Daily Dirt

Awful Articles

Fantasy Old Man Roleplaying

I hope you guys enjoyed this update as much as we enjoyed making it. David is fun and easy to work with, and a thoroughly fantastic writer and idea guy. I think we've probably got enough ideas for a third go at these characters, but we probably won't be doing that anytime soon.

Moof Knows Things with Tom "Moof" Davies

Moof: did you know that if you cut open a goose you will find that a goose is simply four ducks inside a goose skin
Moof: livestock what do you have against science and facts
Livestock: moof did you use the scientific method
Moof: yes i always do'
Livestock: what was the control group
Moof: a group of ducks
Livestock: what were your protocols on this experiment
Moof: do you mean my independent variables
Livestock: sure why not
Moof: they were ducks and geese
Livestock: what was the procedure
Moof: i cut open a goose to see what was inside
Moof: then i cut open a swan to see what was inside
Livestock: wouldn't the swan be the control group
Moof: yes actually
Livestock: what was inside the swan
Moof: just blood and meat
Moof: next i am going to try with a hippo
Moof: i think there will be pigs inside it
Livestock: do you know anything moof
Moof: yes lots
Livestock: give me some examples
Moof: okay here is an example
Moof: i know how many trees make a forest
Moof: the answer is 39 or more
Livestock: really?
Moof: yes although it might be more to do with tree density maybe
Moof: maybe i need to think on this some more
Livestock: please get back to me with an answer
Moof: livestock i know what a group of crows is called
Moof: do you know
Moof: i know
Livestock: what is it called moof
Moof: A MURDER
Livestock: i don't believe that
Moof: it is true
Moof: a murder of crows
Moof: i think i am going to redecorate my apartment
Moof: and by that i mean put more things on the walls
Moof: for example dead animals
Moof: dead birds
Moof: squirrels
Moof: hobos
Moof: etc
*** Moof signed off.

- Josh "Livestock" Boruff