I had a lot of fun writing this update, even though most of it was written while under the strain of a terrible hangover. I really do love Intellivision games and they are a huge part of my childhood. My favorite games were Bump N Jump, Burger Time, AD&D, Utopia, Frog Bog, and B-17 Bomber which was the first speaking game ever made and you needed a special module to run it. I normally know an update is going to be pretty good (at least to me), when I giggle like an imp while writing it. I do almost all my updates at work when I have spare time, so my co-workers have learned to accept this as normal behavior for me. When I am struggling for ideas and it takes me an hour to do a paragraph, I can tell the update will be subpar and I'm just not in the mood to be funny. When that happens, I out source my updates to cheap foreign comedy writers in Asia. Translating it is a bitch.
Here is a flash version of Burger Time that you can play at work or school! Send me your high scores and I will laugh in your face.
I'm slowly weaning myself off the Vicodin, but this stuff really rocks my socks. I feel like I can lift this chair, OVER MY HEAD!
I want to thank Humanity for making the artwork for today’s update. I’m going to ask him if I need help from now on because he is much more pleasant to work with than Shmorky. Shmorky is a big fat buttface. I also want to give props to Spacecow for the awesome Steve Perry images. Rock!
Burger Time Trivia Bonus: The reason one of the food items is an egg is because in Japan it is a common topping option on hamburgers. Those fucking goofballs.
IMPORTANT UPDATE: My cat’s ear is folded inside out, but I’m not going to fix it. It’s part of God’s plan.
Grocery List For 4/28/05:
- Frosted Mini-Wheats
- 4 lobsters
- KY Jelly
Ok I’m going to sleep now. All this beer didn’t react well to the Vicodin, Zoloft, and Cheez-Its. Toodles.
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
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