Like I said in the title, "HorseZ" is a very real game. It's the FAQ that's fake. Except for the obviously fake stuff (racial slurs from the horses, the "ghost sugar cube" thing, everything I brought up here was real. Needless to say "HorseZ" is a very bad game, and you probably shouldn't play it. Thanks to Doc Evil for loaning me some HTML, by the by.
Someone read the Humboldt articles from a few weeks ago and was nice enough to send me an anonymous gift certificate. Please don't think this is some shallow attempt to whore myself out for Amazon bucks; there was just no way to respond to the person who sent it and I really appreciated the gesture.
Mr. (or Ms., or Mrs.) anonymous, just so you know, I got a ton of used books I've been wanting to read for a while now. Thank you very, very much for the present, even if I felt it was undeserved. It certainly didn't go to waste!
Last week we took a few stabs at Mike Vanderjagt, which was fun. In a few days we'll be taking stabs at Allen Iverson, which is more fun. Read Pregame Wrapup. Tell your friends to read Pregame Wrapup. Read it over and over and over and click all the ads on all the pages. Times are tough and I need to buy a new book on self-promotion!
I purposely avoided the "seasonal" thing for this update but I wanted to wish you all some happy gift-giving holidays! It's been a great year and hopefully I'll be churning out the same uninspired crap in December '07.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!