USA 2006 World Tour Progress Report
Funding has been temporarily pulled from this goodwill tour of laughs because of the high price of gasoline and my extravagant purchases from Skymall. We still have half a year left to tour so right now I am getting a lot of sleep and playing Oblivion so I am ready for action. Once gas prices hit $1.00 a gallon again, we have been given the green light to get this show on the road. Thank you for your patience concerning this matter if you are one of the many schools and hospitals I promised to visit to perform a puppet show. Pardon our dust during this transition processes.
Front Page Gossip
There is no gossip this month. Sorry but all the writers have been behaving themselves since my watchdog task force has been keeping tabs on them. It's sad really, when you love something so much that you destroy it Lets just pray that one of them slips up soon and get caught drunk driving or diagnosed with a rare cancer. Where have all the cowboys gone?
See ya next month kids!
The first time "fast", "decisive", and "efficient" could have been used to describe the Minecraft development team was when they snatched the $2.5 billion dollar check out of Microsoft's sweaty, shaking hand.
Paleo guru and definite non-idiot Luke K. clears the air about some of your favorite pumpkin treats this holiday season. Also he weighs in on the controversy surrounding a paleo wedding cake.
No lifeguard on duty. Maze run at your own risk.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!