Boring Thanks You's And Stuff
Big thanks today to Diana for helping me come up with the idea and DocEvil for the great photoshops that he graciously did after I held him at gunpoint for a few hours.
Also props to my peep Abraham who took some time off his busy schedule of flirting with orcs or whatever to give me some good advice on this article. And thanks to Pantsfish and Bobservo who usually read my articles for me, but weren't on IM today those lazy bastards so I was forced to write my own jokes instead of just taking theirs.
Passover Is A Fantastic Holiday If You Enjoy Not Eating Bread And Also Thinking About Bread While Not Eating Bread
As many of you may know, now is an important time of year for us Jews. I know it's an important time of year because I haven't eaten bread since Wednesday night and boy does bread sound good right now. Even the word sounds great. Bread. Breeeeeeeaaaaad. Let's all take a moment a look at some pictures of bread:
It's soooo beautiful.
I am licking my screen right now.
Goddamn I could go for some bread. Instead I'm going to go eat some delicious matzah, which is exactly like bread if instead of baking the dough you threw it entirely out and just ate a bunch of stale crackers you found in the back of your cupboard and for some reason glued together into one big thing.
If you want to email me about anything, send it along to [email protected]. Shalom y'all.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
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