FIRST I STOPPED BY CALIFORNIA TO GIVE RESPECT TO MY ANCESTORS BUT I GOT DISTRACTED BY THIS FUCKIN' FISH. I TRIED TO EAT HIM BUT IT WAS MADE OF WOOD. WHAT THE FUCK PEOPLE!?
I MUST HAVE SOME MAD ADD BECAUSE I ALSO GOT DISTRACTED BY THIS AWESOME ASS ROLLER COASTER. IT WAS PRETTY FUN BUT SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME.
I FOUND MY STUPID ASS ANCESTORS AND NEARLY DIED. WHAT THE FUCK CALIFORNIA?
I CONTINUED TO THE WEST UNTIL I FOUND THIS LARGE PIECE OF SHIT WALL. I COULD WALK RIGHT OVER THIS USELESS THING. WHAT THE FUCK???
"Your left eye," the optometrist casually explained while blasting my face with a blue laser at point blank range, "is farsighted and shaped like an eyeball. The other eye is nearsighted and shaped like a football. Not even a good football."
Jeff Foxworthy has awakened to the new flesh to tell some redneck jokes.
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