Steve: Why didn't they finish putting this one together?
Zack: Someone was too busy texting and wouldn't read me the instructions or help in any way, and that's why our robot can't see anything that's not right in front of it.
Steve: I bet they based this one on ostriches because they're the toughest of the birds.
Zack: Tougher than bald eagles?
Steve: I'm as patriotic as the next guy but I don't think an eagle can disembowel you with a kick or run like 100 mph.
Zack: An ostrich is probably more dangerous than a real Jenner.
Steve: No way, dude. I mean, mad respect to an ostrich, it is a serious beast, but it mounts zero missiles and lasers.
Zack: That's not what wikipedia says.
Steve: My mom blocked that when she caught me trying to add a drawing of hot boobs for the "hot boobs" article. Which I also started and edit.
Zack: Researchers need a graphic example of hot boobs. How else will they understand the concept?Steve: Exactly. But now I can only check it from the library and that was like two days ago. God only knows what they have reverted my article to by now. Last time I left it for more than a day they removed my whole section about perfect nipple sizes and the accompanying chart.
Tucker Carlson's idiot brother just called New York mayor Bill de Blasio's spokeswoman a "LabiaFace."
Hey, have you guys ever seen a picture of a cat before? Well, guess what. It’s your lucky day, because I’m mixing the concept of a picture of my cat with the concept of the Internet!
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.