Zack: Ashnod's cargo cult idol to Tony Stark.
Steve: For sale one really really needley suit. I don't know why I put needles all over it. I wasn't thinking. I had this suit and all these needles and glue and I just got carried away. The good news is it hurts a lot when you attack. The bad news is if you try to put this on your camel he's going to die.
Zack: When Ashnod gets stressed out he starts squeezing his sword and bending lumps onto it. Trust me, during the week of Mishra's yearly performance review he'll make a broadsword look like a waveform.
Steve: Excellent for commanders of armies of cushion or pillow men. Do you have a stuffed puppet man army? Perfect armor.
Zack: I want a stuffed puppet man army.
Steve: How many forests do you own?
A thousand years ago, dudes were dying from splinters, but now the wizard potion that cleans our light wounds costs less than a Dr. Pepper in 1994. I love this medicinal 7up.
U2 and Apple have conspired to place a U2 album into your music in the year 2014. You own a U2 album. And you can't get rid of it.
Ron Paul spins in his chair, trying to grab his decorative antique musket but Freddy gets it first.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.