Steve: Rifts is obsessed with squirt guns. Squirt guns hurt vampires so the Rifts vampires book is like all stuff like this.
Zack: Yeah, sure, water is basically the easiest thing to find in Canada next to air, but we prefer magical water.
Steve: The water is more pure. Less pollution.
Zack: How do you know that? What studies have been done? Has the EPA tested it? This mommy wants her babies protected from unsafe magically created water. I'm not trusting my babies around these Canadian squirt guns.
Steve: Then your babies will die to the vampires!
Zack: Then prepare to get sued in federal court for allowing those vampires near my babies.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Youtube user HolkHogan420 has been systematically exposing all of the Illuminati's plans.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.