Plush Parrot Adult Costume
Listen To What This Parrot Has To Say!
Includes: Plush suit with attached head. Machine Washable. Made of polyester and is flame retardant.
- One size fits most
Zackula: "Welcome to Bird Crazy Parrotdise, where all of your dreams Toucan come true. Smoking or non?"
Dr. Thorpenstein: More great Halloween copywriting for you: the headline of this baby is "Listen to what this parrot has to say!" Yeah, this is the kind of outfit that really adds a kind of dramatic weight to your words.
Zackula: All of the great orators wore bird suits. Lincoln dressed like a cockatiel.
Dr. Thorpenstein: In 50 years they'll be saying, "It's really amazing that Dr. King's words had that sort of power, because you have to remember that this was long before they invented the fluffy gay parrot suits that have become synonymous with persuasive oration."
Zackula: You'll also be perfectly camouflaged if you ever need to give a speech inside a lava chimney. 100 dollars also seems a little steep, but I guess any price is worth it for the attention of a crowd.
Dr. Thorpenstein: Palin should have worn this at the VP debate. She might have looked less retarded up there.
Zackula: I don't think the Republicans wanted anyone to actually listen to her words.
Dr. Thorpenstein: Well, I guess it's not too late for McCain to pick one up, it might offset his ghastly pallor.
Zackula: It's hard to see melanomas of the face when you're giving your speech from inside a burning magma furnace.
Dr. Thorpenstein: Yeah, let's make fun of John McCain's cancer a little, I don't think our smug liberalism is coming through quite enough here. Also, Palin has a disabled daughter, let's work that in.
Zackula: If we can't make fun of retards and cancer death what the hell use is it being commie faggots?
Zackula: I think we earned that right.
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
Fashion SWAT... the fashion industry is obsessed with impracticality. We know that what designers create was never meant to be worn by the grimy masses, but that doesn't somehow diminish how ridiculous many of these costumes are. Make no mistake, they are costumes, and like a Halloween prize pageant we will turn our discerning gaze on the grievous fashion misfires of Paris, Milan, and New York. We're not pulling any punches, and we're definitely not interested in making any friends. We're Joan Rivers without Melissa Rivers to temper our screeching. We're the Fashion Police in jack boots. We are Fashion SWAT.