|Henchman Status Update (5 of 5)|
|The status of has M.A.S.T.R.M.I.N.D. been changed from ACTIVE to DESTROYED.|
|Name: AEC-002 (DESTROYED)|
Codename(s): M.A.S.T.R.M.I.N.D., H.E.L.L.M.A.T.
Join Date: 7-22-83
Primary Role: Self-aware supercomputer
Secondary Role: Calculating, decoding, spell-checking, digitizing, floppy-reading
Specialties: Interfacing with seven different types of dot matrix printer, running all AEC-001 or AEC-002 compatible games, connecting to government BBSes, and evil operations oversight.
Availability: On Hire (hire)
Average Customer Rating: (rate)
|Circumstance of Contract Liquidation:|
With Dreadstation venting all of its atmosphere into space, most of the henchmen dead or dying, and the UNFORCE astrotroopers storming the control room, M.A.S.T.R.M.I.N.D. exercised the only option it had remaining. It loaded Lemonade Stand as Dreadstation was taken over by UNFORCE. An EMP grenade fried the computer's circuits just as it hit a very hot day, tragically squandering a profit (more)
Sleeping with AC is at this point a basic human right. But if you're one of the doomed souls forced to deal with global warming on a nightly basis, here's an hourly breakdown on how to get the most out of your inferno hellscape of a bedroom.
Some of the Internet's most veteran anatomy experts convened to discuss the stolen nude photos of Jennifer Lawrence and other beautiful celebrities.
We're spelunking through the movie catacombs this week. Join us, won't you?
Featured articles and columns that don't fit anywhere else on Something Awful.