Welcome back, Adverse Interests, LLC. you are now logged in. Thank you for choosing FIST for your staffing needs. We hope OPERATION A QUANTUM OF VIOLENCE went well!
You have 4 Henchman Status Updates awaiting your immediate attention.
Your credit with us is poor.
|Henchman Status Update (1 of 4)|
|The status of Hate Otter has been changed from ACTIVE to DECEASED.|
|Name: Hogan (DECEASED)|
Codename(s): Hate Otter, Nearly Super Soldier, Almost Indestructible, Weapon J, Hoagie
Join Date: 6-23-98
Primary Role: Extremely Tough Soldier
Secondary Role: Getting pissed, fighting, fightin', spot-welding, facial hairing
Specialties: Copper skeleton, retractable tin claws, scabbing factor, four kidneys, double skull (copper), supernumary rectums, mysterious past, terrible flashbacks, really bad temper, yelling, leaping, cutting things.
Availability: On Hire (hire)
Average Customer Rating: (rate)
|Circumstance of Contract Liquidation:|
Was shot to death by the Time-SS during a raid on the Timelair in Alabama. Forewarned by American terror-sympathizers, Hate Otter was ordered to hold Quantum Himmler's jackbooted puppets at bay while the administrative might of Adverse Interests, LLC and their henchmen escaped into the past in the rented time machine. Hate Otter fought valiantly, but his scabbing factor was overwhelmed by the quantity of bullets being inserted into his face. Several of the (more)
Tucker Carlson's idiot brother just called New York mayor Bill de Blasio's spokeswoman a "LabiaFace."
Hey, have you guys ever seen a picture of a cat before? Well, guess what. It’s your lucky day, because I’m mixing the concept of a picture of my cat with the concept of the Internet!
Featured articles and columns that don't fit anywhere else on Something Awful.