|Henchman Status Update (4 of 4)|
|The status of Time Machine has been changed from ACTIVE to DESTROYED.|
|Name: Titor Mk. VII (DESTROYED)|
Codename(s): Time Machine
Join Date: ?-?-??
Primary Role: Time Traveling
Secondary Role: Flux capacitoring, cocaine smuggling, 80s cruise-in attending
Specialties: Bending the beams of laser pointers, bucket seat reclining, traveling through frigging time what isn't that enough?
Availability: On Hire (hire)
Average Customer Rating: (rate)
|Circumstance of Contract Liquidation:|
Having disrupted the peaceful rule of the Eternal Reich, the administrators of Adverse Interests returned to 2009 only to discover that the Time-SS was replaced with T.E.A.M., the Americans were almost as insufferable as those happy good-times Nazis, and humans were replaced with hermaphrodite reptiles. T.E.A.M. agents failed to apprehend the Adverse Interests administrators and executives, but were able to destroy the time machine, which stalled at a stop light and (more)
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
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