QUIZ FOR MALES:
Question #1: When spotting an attractive female, the first question that enters my mind is:
Does she have a boyfriend? How can I introduce myself to her? What do I have to roll to kill her? I wish my mom had a pair of hips like those.
Question #2: The most important quality I'm looking for in a woman is:
Good looks. Great personality. A lack of vision. A pulse.
Question #3: I had my first date when I was:
14 years old or younger. 15 - 18 years old. 18 - 21 years old. However old I am now plus an estimated additional two decades.
Question #4: If I could compare my dream woman to a car, she would be like:
A classic Porsche; sleek, beautiful, and expensive to maintain. A BMW; a trendy, stylish model that's hip with the "in crowd." A hovercar; futuristic and able to shoot lasers from its headlights. The twisted, gnarled pile of burnt metal I passed alongside the highway on my way to work.
Question #5: I often masturbate:
Once a week or less. Once every couple days. Every day ending with a "-y". Whenever "She's the Sheriff" reruns come on.
Question #6: My dream date would take place:
On a moonlit walk across the beach. A fancy Italian restaurant. Anywhere, as long as it's not in my imagination like all those other dates with the cast from "Saved By the Bell." During my parole.
Ask any cowboy and they'll tell you: The deadliest snake in the wild west is Lava-Filled Hole Shaped Exactly Like A Cowboy Silhouette
Garfield is a poison of bigotry on our culture and I have never been more offended on behalf of people than I am right now.
Ben Garrison's Cartoons are finally explained!
me, getting my arm hacked off: you moron. chainsaws arent even used in hockey
(indecipherable yelling as eight heroes stand still in an ankle-deep wavepool)
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