QUIZ FOR MALES:
Question #1: When spotting an attractive female, the first question that enters my mind is:
Does she have a boyfriend? How can I introduce myself to her? What do I have to roll to kill her? I wish my mom had a pair of hips like those.
Question #2: The most important quality I'm looking for in a woman is:
Good looks. Great personality. A lack of vision. A pulse.
Question #3: I had my first date when I was:
14 years old or younger. 15 - 18 years old. 18 - 21 years old. However old I am now plus an estimated additional two decades.
Question #4: If I could compare my dream woman to a car, she would be like:
A classic Porsche; sleek, beautiful, and expensive to maintain. A BMW; a trendy, stylish model that's hip with the "in crowd." A hovercar; futuristic and able to shoot lasers from its headlights. The twisted, gnarled pile of burnt metal I passed alongside the highway on my way to work.
Question #5: I often masturbate:
Once a week or less. Once every couple days. Every day ending with a "-y". Whenever "She's the Sheriff" reruns come on.
Question #6: My dream date would take place:
On a moonlit walk across the beach. A fancy Italian restaurant. Anywhere, as long as it's not in my imagination like all those other dates with the cast from "Saved By the Bell." During my parole.
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