He-Man quickly climbs onto the Dragon Walker (hey kids, you can buy the Dragon Walker at your local toy store!) and crosses an "impassable mountain gorge"(hey kids, you can buy the Dragon Walker at your local toy store!), the word "impassable" of course meaning "easy to cross on foot" (hey kids, you can buy the Dragon Walker at your local toy store!). He promptly reaches the North River and begins to implement his intensely clever plan, whatever the hell it may be.
By the magic of irrigation, I have the power of primitive dam construction! He-Man decides to toss a few rocks in front of the North River, causing it to divert and begin flowing towards the nefarious Snake Mountain. Of course the villagers depended on the North River to supply them with water, but hey, they can just get the retard in the bee suit to bring them a couple of buckets when they're low. I mean the guy can't be THAT busy getting beaten up by Skeletor's henchmen 24-7.
REFORMED HOG - Former member of the swine family, has now agreed to behave like a proper dog. Free to patient home willing to overlook physical defects. 555-2519
What do you do when The Dark Knight himself pulls a boner?
Available in Large, which is actually a Medium stretched out to appear bigger.
If you're in a tight spot, this is going to be really helpful (I'M JOKING. I'M KIDDING AROUND)
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