I Am Ulillillia, Developer of Hit-a-bump, and This Is How I Work
Ulillillia is a game developer best known for The Supernatural Olympics (PC), UNO: Survive the Flood (cards), and Hit-a-bump v6 (board, coins, marbles, rocks). He works out of his home developing the most accurate games to true life. These detailed simulations include scrolling and color levels with flying and the correct slope ratio on all backgrounds. He is also a successful author and has developed a number of tips and secrets for living which have probably been redistributed without attribution by Lifehacker.
Name: Nick "Ulillillia" Smith
Occupation: Game developer, secret tip discoverer, dreamer
Current computers: I currently need a new computer. Read the FAQ page about what happened with my computer and the juice cup.
Current mobile devices: I do not have transportation.
One word that best describes how I work: License Plate Math
What's your workspace like?
I have a computer PC with a keyboard interface and I also use the mouse. I had a Gravis joystick but it has lost strength and only turns left. I am repairing this currently. I keep three types of altoids on my desk (Wintergreen, Peppermint, Spearmint) within reach. This is helpful with my breath issue (see Problems FAQ) and gives me a 2.5 energy boost when I am getting slower at programming. I had a lamp but it was taken away because I was melting pieces of plastic onto the lightbulb. I will get it back when I clean up the scrap plastic from my sprues. There are pencils and pens and a size 3 bin of legos that I use for prototyping games. All of the human legs are red which is the rarest leg color by 8.6.
What is your sleep routine?
A problem for me. I dream during irregular sleep. My favorite dreams are mud dreams. I have had 51 mud dreams. Probably my favorite mud dream is 1-1 from 2000. Four humans are walking pointlessly in a mud lake at a constant depth. Some humans were sticking out if they were tall. This dream was not scary at all. I have forgotten it.
How do you stay healthy?
Health is my greatest challenge. For health, I go into a lake. I go up a hill and then down from a hill. I jump sometimes, but my jump is low. My health is 7.1 to 7.5 variable which is better than it was in the past. My strength is increasing. I am at my healthiest in the 3.25 hours after I have eaten the meal I have every day. I have combined all meals into one meal for efficiency. My normal meal is pizza, which contains high calories but this can be reduced by degreasing the pizza using napkins. I do not eat eggs. You can read my FAQ on pizza and Hamburger Helper for more information.
What are your best tips/lifehacks?
I have many tips. A 5.0 usefulness tip I have developed is one so that you do not spill a soda. I call it the soda trick. When you buy a 20-ounce soda in a bottle do not open it right away. Whenever you want to take a drink, open the lid and listen for pressurized gas sounds. If you hear them do not continue. If you see bubbles rise up rapidly, close the lid. Closing the lid prevents bubbles from rising up more. Once the bubbles go down, open it again and check. Continue until the bubbles stop going up. If the bubbles remain down, open your soda and have a drink. Bilbo on the 3DGS forums said "another way to stop bottles or cans fizzing up is to tap the on the top 4 or 5 times, works best with cans but also works with bottles and stops the drink from tasting flat from losing all its 'fizz'". I have not tested this method yet. I have not had a soda since 2004.
What one thing can you do better than anyone else?
I have mental math skills that are my highest skill. I can multiply two-digit numbers in my mind within 20 seconds. This is how strong I am. I have developed many tricks to increase my math speed and power. I could do an entire 4th grade math book in my head within 2 months. I could compare the slope of any mountain using the hand trick to determine the average slope of the mountain range in one day. I can calculate mud depth using the ruler trick and determine calorie removal during degreasing in only 45 seconds. This is a phenomenal speed. I keep getting better at this skill. I have not seen any person who could rival this speed. I have not met any math experts. Goodbye.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
Featured articles and columns that don't fit anywhere else on Something Awful.