But I can have an orgasm from inflicting violence on a willing partner, fully clothed, with nobody touching me.I think that's crazy.
That's not crazy. My pet can orgasm from just the sound of my voice telling her to. THAT'S CRAZY.
(of course, she's spent years training herself to cum on command, so it's not really something I can brag about, and I tend to keep her at a state of "high alert" at all times, so :p)
wow, i can't believe i haven't posted in one of these yet (i'm originally an '04, but i got b& for homegrown)i'm quite a perverted freak...here's most of my weird fetishes, starting with the slightly less freaky ones:
-painoh gods, i love it so much. i pretty much always have - i remember being in kindergarten and running the shopping cart over my toes at the grocery store because it felt good and all kinds of stuff like that. pain makes me really euphoric and feel yummy all over afterwards. i'm usually all quivering and happy afterwards, but i need someone to snuggle me and help me stand up. i can even have orgasms from it, especially nipple/boob torture. it's especially nice when it's enough to make me cry. i'd like to try some heavier stuffs, like caning and needles/staples.
-bondagebeing tied up gives me all kinds of neat sensations, especially when combined with torture. it puts me in a nice relaxed space, and i love the feeling of completely giving up control. i like ropes a lot...shibari is so pretty, and i think there's something really neat and personal about it. i used to tie my hands up with the plastic stringy things newspapers are bound with...and i got really hot when i played with toy handcuffs when i was little.
-watersportsmmm delicious pee. i really can't get enough. nothing makes me hotter than getting peed on, drinking as much as i can, and rubbing the rest all over my face/hair/boobs. wetting the bed and peeing in my clothes is another really old fun activity for me, though i didn't get to really explore that until recently. holding in my pee until i absolutely can't anymore feels sooo nice...i've gotten close to coming from holding it and wetting my panties in the shower (there's a video of this on the internets *giggles*).
-mysophiliai'm really into general dirtiness...and i get really turned on when someone i like is all smelly and sweaty. other gross stuff like mucus is hot too >_>.
-exhibitionismi really like it when other people watch me being naughty...and i generally take it as far as i can get away with. i like doing demos at fetish events and dungeons where lots of people can see. i have a board over on chanchan for my naughty stuff, and i'm probably going to start my own porn site soon as well as appearing in semi-pro videos. ^_^ i also would really like to make a public peeing video, but that would definitely involve some work and be kinda risky.
-tentaclesmmm delicious slimy appendages. i suppose this is probably from fapping to lots of hentai during my formative sexual years. i've had fantasies about having sex with octopodes and eels and sea cucumbers, and other slippery sea creatures. the "annotated field guide to tentacle attacks" made me ridiculously hot when i saw it on gurochan >_>.
-nekomimii like to wear things with cat ears, even if they aren't always recognized as such (everyone thinks my puchiko hat is pikachu. there's a big difference between an electric rat and a five-year old catgirl!). i also meow a lot, and i love being scratched and petted and stuff. i've always thought catgirls in anime are really neat and adorable...i'm not as into the full-on anthro art, although some of that is hot (*cough* midna porns *cough*)
-ageplay/incestplay/molestationi like to regress into the headspace of a little kid...i've felt anywhere from 3 to 13 before, but mostly i'm around 5. i like to play with my plushies, color and draw with crayons, watch nick jr shows, and that sort of thing. i drink out of my sippy cup pretty much all the time. i also suck on a pacifier when i go to sleep, although that's not really like regression into infancy for me...it's just kind of a comforting thing. diapers are fun too, but mostly just for simplifying cleanup of pee-play. i kinda like thinking about advanced sciencey stuff like o-chem and electronics when i'm regressed - it seems out of place, but i had an information fetish as a little kid (seriously, i'd get turned on by watching educational shows for high school students on KLCS. i can only imagine how amazing wikipedia would've been back then). i love it when people molest me and i feel all preyed on and corrupted. ageplay isn't necessarily sexual though, and molestation can also be in other contexts for me. i normally seem a bit childish - it's really nice when people pick up on it subconsciously and treat me like a little kid ^_^. being 6'3" hurts a lot in that department though ;______;
-drugsyeah, not really a fetish, but e+sex = holy fucking shit. just the smell of vicks is a huge turnon for me now...and thanks to mental association, i think mdma tastes like yummy pee (a lot of it gets excreted unchanged in urine). getting stoned makes me really horny and enhances sensations too.
of course, that's nowhere near comprehensive. there's also the more vanilla-y stuff like eating ass, giving oral, biting, and that sort of thing. plus i tend to pick up new perversions as i encounter them.i'm one dirty little kitten ^_~
This is your typical consumer model throne. If you just want a cheap prop, it's fine. If you want to actually sit like a king, pony up the cash and get yourself a prosumer model. This entry level stuff is more for a duke or baron at best.
Do you wish to know what computers will be doing in the year to come? With a sigh I shall exert the minimal effort it takes to reveal all. Feel free to print out these predictions and share them with your friends via fax.
The Something Awful Forums are, by far, the greatest and most entertaining community on the internet. From the Comedy Goldmine to Photoshop Phriday, our forums are pretty much the lone island refusing to be engulfed by the sea of stupidity that is the internet. While sections like the Comedy Goldmine and Photoshop Phriday showcase the intentionally hilarious forum creations, we've failed to reveal the coin's flip side. The Great Goon Database is a depository of unintentionally amusing Something Awful Forum quotes demonstrating the darker side of SA. Special thanks to Goon "LittleJoe" for collecting and sorting these gems.