Thank you for attending 6th Annual TrendMax Caveman Business Convention located in scenic Grugville Civic Center. Running for three passes of glowing eye of fire in sky. Hotel accommodation available from Airport Best Western conveniently located to finest entertainment Grugville have offer. Complimentary bagel breakfast available in lounge for ticketholder brought to you by TrendMax, Solutions for Business on Grow.
Keynote Speaker Are:
Day One - Horg Ugstein from Rock for Throw Stick, LLC talk on trends in outsource in stick making to Neanderthal.
Day Two - Meegia Burton from New Horizon Integration Solution, GmbH talk on integrate solution for make Rock On Rope Trap to kill giant cat.
Day Three - Special Guest "Hloggo Top" make you go funny sound about object in bag follow by brief closing comment from TrendMax COO Grurk Pershing.
Included in this complimentary guide are three short article from last year three speaker. We hope you enjoy and be sure to drop business card off at convention info booth for chance to win car made out of rat bone and caveman hair. New model!
Competitiveness in Overcrowded Market Difficult
By Juck Blargman, CFO Blargman & Tguckheim
First come giant insect. He good.
Giant insect not adapt when second come giant dinosaur. Dinosaur very good. He terror!
Then come caveman and at same time come giant cats. Now compete in business environment against dinosaur. Also some insect, though less giant. Why? Not enough oxygen.
Do you want caveman business be insect gasp for oxygen and shrink? Or you want lot of oxygen grow brand, increase revenue stream and market share? What you really want what decide future.
Caveman no try then we dinosaur or giant insect. Caveman must evolve into business world of six million B.C. or caveman business not competitive.
What make dinosaur so fast and mean? What make him big? Why him so powerful and hungry?
"Because dinosaur industry dynamic with fungible asset," you might say.
Good answer, is true, but real reason is dinosaur want it. Dinosaur not wake up in morning, think about which tie he wear to cave. Dinosaur not stand around and worry about good relationship with coworker. For dinosaur relationship with coworker is biting. Relationship with customer is biting. Handshake, more biting.
What I say is dinosaur not stop. Dinosaur always move forward. Maximize efficiency. Confidence. Think about what you business could achieve if every day you double income.
Day one you kill two tree cats with rock. Day two you kill three tree cat and slimy head from swamp. Day four you kill many slimy head, a small dinosaur and two baby monster from sky. Day five again, double production.
This can be you business. Learn activate potential. Peel onion.
This is your typical consumer model throne. If you just want a cheap prop, it's fine. If you want to actually sit like a king, pony up the cash and get yourself a prosumer model. This entry level stuff is more for a duke or baron at best.
Do you wish to know what computers will be doing in the year to come? With a sigh I shall exert the minimal effort it takes to reveal all. Feel free to print out these predictions and share them with your friends via fax.
Something Awful Guides can help you, the Internet reader, make the most out of your life and just might possibly end up getting you incapacitated or killed!