AT A GLANCE: A port of the 2002 smash-hit of the
same name, Killbox Reloaded takes the popular Killbox franchise to exciting new heights.
After playing this map you'll also want to find some new heights as well, you know, to jump
DESCRIPTION: From the map's readme file:
Uh, loved killbox for the sheer carnage and fun-factor as did many others.
Wanted to bring it to HL2 and see it live on. I tried to stay as true to the original as
possible. However, I had to change some weapons/ammo placement due to the different array of
weapons in Half-Life 2, obviously. Most of the rest is the same with some minor tweeks and
some visual enhancements. - Rhino
It doesn't matter how far the technology has advanced. It doesn't matter how much Half Life
is upgraded over the years. It doesn't matter how many new effects and new features Valve
implements into the game. It doesn't matter how much versatility the editor has to allow
users to create maps that literally mirror their vision. No matter what, people will produce
and play the same crap they did from three years ago as if they are pretending it never went out of style. What makes someone say, "Oh wow, this
new Source engine can do some really great things! Hm, what kind of map should I make first?
Oh, I know! I THINK I WILL PORT KILLBOX TO THE SOURCE ENGINE!!! I'LL BECOME AN INTERNET LEGEND!!!"
There is nothing here that needs to "live on". The whole concept of a giant "killing box" needs to be taken out back Old Yeller style and
put out of it's fucking misery. Yeah, the Half Life 2 community really needed a Killbox port. It's
not like the stupid fucking moron quota isn't already satisfied by HL2World and the Steam Forums. Do you honestly want me to believe that
people still want to play shit like this? After playing the steller fucking masterpeice that
is Half Life 2, people still have a thirst for giant boxes full of random weapons from which
there is no escape? Luckly Rhino has stayed as true to the original map as possible because
I would have just died if anything was changed. Killbox features a perfect balance of
floating platforms and brick walls that any change would just ruin the entire experience.
THE MAP: IT'S A FUCKING BOX OF DOGSHIT. What more needs to be said about maps like this?
They are so devoid of imagination and creativity that you become stupider simply by playing
them. I honestly couldn't believe that anyone would put maps like this in their server
rotation so I checked the Steam server browser. Much to my dismay there are 17 goddamn
servers running some variation of Killbox. These servers are all full or near full and it's
1:30 in the afternoon. Why, God, why?! The only answer I can come up with is that the world
has become so depressing that playing Half Life 2 Deatchmatch on a map called Killbox full
of floating platforms and randomly placed weapons passes for entertainment. Despicable.
did add one new feature to Killbox Reloaded, semen stains on the
GAMEPLAY: There are so many ways to approach Killbox Reloaded that the possibilities are
absolutely endless. Upon spawning on a floating platform five miles in the air you have two
choices, fall to the ground and lose 10 health points, or fall on another floating platform
and lose 10 health points. My favorite strategy is to simply hit the escape key and click on
QUIT GAME as quickly as humanly possible. I win everytime! There is also an elevator that
has unfortunately been afflicted by Parkinson's disease.
FUN FACTOR: If any of the following characteristics describe you, then you will enjoy
1. You failed math class this semester and your parents won't buy you a new video card for
your computer that has roughly seventeen lights inside of it complete with a large window to
view them all through.
2. NO ONE FUCKING UNDERSTANDS ME!!!
3. "i tlod u i was hardcore"
4. Your mom is a fucking bitch who won't leave you alone.
5. You wear a black trenchcoat and fellate men.
6. You believe that "GOD SUX"
7. You believe that "BUSH = HITLER"
8. You ride skateboards.
9. Instead of a Livejournal, you keep a Deadjournal.
10. You have no hope for a future.
Any decent contributing member of society will not enjoy this map. You guys will have to
settle for doing things that are fun!
THE BOTTOM LINE: There is no excuse for this. We are coming up on the year 2005. Read that
correctly? Two-thousand and five. Killbox Reloaded represents everything wrong with mod
communities. Hopefully once a little bit of time has gone by we will see decent Half Life 2 maps
and maybe even some great ones. But the way things are going now man, I just don't know.
ratings go from 0 (bearable) to -10 (painfully terrible).
Total score goes from 0 (ok) to -50 (the worst piece of shit you'll ever play).