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I AM GOING TO WOEKR FOR LEGAEAND ENTARTAINMINT!!!
here si teh emale I wrote back to mistar jess!!!
dear JESS CABLE-
thiank u vary much for yuor lettar. it WAS vary nice for yuo too send it, BUT WHY ARANT MY LEVALS GOOD enough for unreaele 2?!?!? i think yuo are just jelous becuase yuo dont not make Quake3 and that is a vary excellint game, unlike Unrealty Tuornamint (WHICH, by teh way, is for pppl of the "fagot" persuasion). but thats okey, unreale 2 is probaly going to be VARY SCARY LIKE UNREALE ONE, OH NO TITAN, DONT THROW YUOR VARY LARGE BOULDARS AT ME SIR, i will run away and grow NALI HEEALING FRUIT and be a farmar with teh Nanli cows and i have 9 arms like a mongoose!! NOOINDEET hahaha, "UINREALE 2: NALI FRUIT PICNICK LOVE FESTIVALE" haha
Yuor game "Tanks versis Mummys" sounds vary k3wl sir. i wuold like halp write and develope this game vary much mistar smarty Unreale man! i have some ideas which i want too run by yuo so we can develope this game and get it into shelfes by E3 , okety? WHO will programe on this project, beucase if its not John Carmake, I donT KNOW IF ILL WORK ON IT??? okey?
Here are my ideas for a good FPS (first persen shootar) game:::
1) LAVA and lots of it! ppl liek lava and acid vary much and if yuo fall in = yuo died! SO we need to make the game take place by a volcanoe of toxic waste plante. LOTS OF LAVA SIR! NO MORE THAN THAT !!! OKEY... A LITTLE MORE, YEAH!@
2) aliens!!! alienses are scarey, so we need to make the game in space, like on teh planet JEPHKAY-7 (haha, that is my name relly! it's called an "EASTAR EGG" which ppl find out aftar playing teh game!). so teh planat will be purple adn have a missale base for shots teh Earth with! and you go in to save the worald from teh aliens. BUT yuo saids they were mummies to, so the aliens are mummys too! Like they have bandaadges and stuff but teh bandages are alien spidars and there are ghosts inside teh mummies bandages too. AND they shots laster beams from theyre eyes to. AND there's space cars. and a mop
3)) THE HERO HAS TOO BE LIKE DUKE NUKAM!!! duke si teh best charactar evar, and says funny things like "WHO WANTS SOME???" HAHAHAHHAHA! out heroe would be called "Muscals McHenry" an he has a gun for an arm a gun for an arm! he can get gun upgrades at alian Stations and makes teh shots FIREBALLS an bullATS, and laster beams, and tripbombs, and NUCLEAR BLASTS. his head can explodes too! and then he grows a new head! BECAUSE HE SI AN ANDRIOID Cyboarg. Like Fred and Ethyl????
4. bad guys are differant classes and pictares like Soldar of Fortine. bad alien mummy wizards, lobstar commandoes, NINJA SHARKS, something that shots ice rays, ghost snake, MISTAR HOUSE TEETH ALIENS, and a fat guy with marbles. Oh yeah, tanks too because of teh game name!@# AND DONT FORGET CYCLOPES TOO, YUOR GAME WILL NOT BE SUCESSFUL WITHOUT A CYCLOPS SIR
5) lots of technilogical stuff for new video cards! anti-aliening, q-buffer, transform and lightning, realtime COBOL, dynamic procesing allocatian, an decals! an textares should be 4000x4000 in size. BUT it has too run on my COMPAQ 166 too!!!! so bettar call in teh smarty men programers sir!
i haev enclosed some "concept work" to. hopefuly we can get started working soon an yuo can give me my $50,000 advance becuase i want to buy teh new Jiggleypoof card!!!
THANK U BYE