Scotty (Lowtax) - see thats what I was thinking too, but my dad says I have to make graphics on our churchs webpage that will hypnotize homosexuals and help them unconsciously realize they need Jesus. he says many homosexuals are set in there ways and wont repent unless we can get into there heads, so he wants me to make pictures and movies that teach them this (since they wont learn on there own)

Anointed - Do you believe in demons or demonic opression and even possession?

Scotty (Lowtax) - yes I have seen it before my dad can cast out the demons quite easily. he has been doing it ever since 1974 when the crippled child was crippled by the devil who was in her crippled legs and my dad stopped her crippledness and she could walk when he cast the deamons from her legs!!! the demons then flew into a jar and father destroyed the jar with the POWER OF JESUS!!i wasnt born then but he told me about it now he exorcizes demons on Tuesdays and Saturdays after bingo.

Anointed - Then if you truely want to reach them, tell your dad to go down to where they hang out. Anoint his hands with oil and reach out grap one with the anointing that GOD has placed in him and cast out the devils of homosexuality. Afterwards, minister to them and bring them up in the Lord for a while. There is a place in Dallas called Isaiah 56 ministries. The deal with sever cases.

Scotty (Lowtax) - We have done that once! we took a bus to san fransisco (the den of sin) and tryed to get them to repent and father was hit by a beer bottle in the face and our van was stolen by the evil homosexuals and later we saw the homosexuals driving around in my dads van and they shot fireworks or something at us!!! it was a horrible time and I still have nightmares!

Anointed - You cant go down there like that!! Again remember this is warfare. People who are in a war dont dress in suits and ties do they? The guys from Isaiah 56 go down looking like they do, but not drag. They have a team of twos and soon as they get one by himself, they lay hands on him and command the devil out of him. Remember the eyes are the windows to your soul, so the devils in them can see what's in you if you look them in the eyes. They usually where sun glasses or always look away when talking. If the devil ever sees what's in you, they take off running faster then cars at times. NO JOKE!

Scotty (Lowtax) - WOW, they run faster than cars, those are high speed fags sir!!!

Scotty (Lowtax) - we did go there not dressed as we normally do, becuase my dad said the homosexuals will stab us if we dont use disguises! so we dressed in festive tshirts from the swap meet that said "TALK TURKEY 1993" and "SINEAD OCOONER" so we would blend in but when father tried to exercise the first sinner, the demons ganged up on us and then the beatings began!

Anointed - That's why you get one off one at a time. Kind of a sniper hunt. Anyway, that is great he was willing to go down there. What about your church? How did they react to it?

Scotty (Lowtax) - they were very positive and supportive and helped father heal after the hospital had to remove the picnic basket from his arm. we did not ask them to go because we knew there would be great danger involved and did not want them to risk there lives fleeing from the marauding homosexuals.

Anointed - so how many people went?

Scotty (Lowtax) - My father and I. the rest stayed back because we did not want them to risk there lives. plus two people looks less conspicuous (sp?)

Anointed - how old were you?

Scotty (Lowtax) - It was last year, before my 16th birthday

Anointed - Did you get hurt?

Scotty (Lowtax) - I am smaller than my dad, so they did not injure me as much. I ended up falling down a hill into a gulch or something and I hid in a antique store. I wanted to do the work of The Lord but I was too weak to take on all the evil homosexuals who were throwing rocks and pummeling my father with their homosexual weapons like sticks and fists of the devil.

More Pranks [ICQ]

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.