Rob - Hi, would you like to learn about the exciting financial opportunities in the new millenium?
Lowtax - Perhaps! Are you having a web-page?
Rob - Not at the moment, I can give you all of the info you need right now!
Rob - Would you be interested in learning about making money just like your favorite movie star?
Lowtax - JIM BALGEADUCIA?
Rob - Excuse me sir?
Lowtax - My favorite movie star is Jim Bagleaducia.
Rob - Oh, of course! You can live just like him, if you follow my easy 1-2-3 steps and you will be on your way to making millions!
Lowtax - millions of what?
Rob - Dollars!
Lowtax - OH OKAY
Rob - Soooooo, whaddya say? Are you interested in living like Jim Bagleducia?
Lowtax - he lives like a PIG (I am on the Jim Bagleaducia mailing list)
Rob - Let me rephrase it, are you interested in living like a king? We can make it happen. All it needs is alot of time, and a small fee.
Lowtax - How much fee? I have time, I spends all day on Internet!
Rob - Depends on how much you are willing to invest, you can start with 200 dollars, or work your way up to 200,000 dollars!
Lowtax - WOW
Rob - Yes, it is very promising. So, are you ready? All I need is your confirmation, we can speak on the phone, if you would like.
Lowtax - NO, cannot use phone, mother's on phone, she's talking to famous person who installs cable television
Rob - Well, when will she be off? It is much easier if we can talk on the phone, although I suppose it is possible via ICQ
Lowtax - I dont know, shes been on phone for long time. She calls famous man to come over, install cable, and there is dancing too. Now I just use Internet, look for moneys to invest in. We have moneys set aside for Internet programs, its where moneys is!
Is the world ready for Staind By Me, St@nd By e-Me, and Crank 3: Stand By Me?
Finally: an advice column for the rest of us! (Who seek to enslave humanity.)
A Goon outs himself as a wizard and gets a warm reception from the rogues/rangers/paladins gallery!
Our Something Awful ICQ pranks target the worst and most idiotic folks on the Internet. Believe it or not, these ICQ pranks are all - unfortunately - real.