Lowtax - okey, she almost done on phone So what is your job then? Do you make stocks?
Rob - No, I am the salesman of the company.
Lowtax - oh, you use ICQ communication tool to make sales? Mayeb use email and fax machine, make letters to people on websites?
Rob - Yes
Lowtax - you should watch out, there is bad people on ICQ who try to trick you and things. They make you look like JERK or steal your moneys and you cant find them! you watch out for those people
Lowtax - OKEY mom is off phone, but she wants to ask you questions first, she does not like to spend money without knowing person okay? she has many credit cards
Rob - I will. Is she off the phone yet? It's almost 7:20 here
Lowtax - I put mom on ICQ ask you question first, is that okay? I cant give card until she says OKEY
Rob - Okay.
Lowtax - okey, i put her on now. Pleas be nice to her, she is old. She is not good typer and her name is Marybelle
Lowtax - I put her on now
Rob - Okay sir, I promise.
Lowtax - HEL4RO MY SOEN TELLSL ME YOU ARE SELELING SOMEETHING AND WANTS SCREDIT CARD/???
I HOPE YYYOUR NTJOT TRYING TO BANKKRUPT US WITH PHHONEY CARD!!!!
TELL ME ABOUT SSERIVVCE FIRST BEFRORE I GIVE CARD!
Rob - Yes ma'am, we sell our services to inform the regular Joe about investing and overall financial comfort and success.
Lowtax - JJIJOE?
SSOUNDSe LIKKEE SOME RIPOFF SCAME!
2 wE GOT RIPPEDDd OFF LasST MONTTHA ANDd WE DONTT FALL FOR SCAMES NO MORERE!!!!
M,Y sON SAYS YOOU W#ERE NICcE MAN, so I BEELIVE HIM THHOUHG.
YOU GOTS A WEBPAGE?
Rob - No, not at the moment ma'am. We are not here to rip anyone off.
Lowtax - WELLLT OKAYE, #$YOUS sSOUND LIEKKE A NICe MAN, i DONTY TH48iNK YOURE GOONAA RIPP US OFE.
WHERE DO I ENTRAR CREDTI CRARDS? NUMBAR??
Rob - PM Right here in the box
Lowtax - OKKEAY, LET Me4E GHET IT,
GONA GO GEET CREASDIT CARDD, iLL PUT MY SON ON,
BEEe BACK IN A SEACOND
Lowtax - Hello! Mom said you are "okay man"! she going to get card now
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
Our Something Awful ICQ pranks target the worst and most idiotic folks on the Internet. Believe it or not, these ICQ pranks are all - unfortunately - real.