This article is part of the BarkWire.com series.
Yours truly keeps his eyes on the prize, always looking for terrific new (and old) dogs to spot. Here's this week's muttly crew:
Ding, ding, ding! A new contender enters the game.
Saw Berlin trotting around the town looking sharp as a razor. Clean form, shiny coat, and good size. Seemed smart and responsive to commands. Definitely one top notch Border Collie. I just hope Berlin has the sense to wait out the conflict raging in town. Look folks, we may be looking at, get this, the next Malmesbury. Really, he's that good a dog.
Even BiGDOG's top dog of all time, Panzer, would be impressed with Berlin.
BiGDOG's been hearing a lot of talk about a dog supposedly driving around town in a truck. Let me be the first to say: you people are goddamn idiots. The day a dog drives a truck is the day BiGDOG adopts a fluffy cat. You're seeing things, people.
In other news, there's been a lot of talk about a new dog in town. BiGDOG's been doing his best to figure out who this new dog is, but is coming up empty. BiGDOG's not one to guess, but I can't help but wonder if this new dog has anything to do with the newly formed alliance of Senator's crew, Scar, Danger, Sulphur, and The Gambler. BiGDOG's gonna speculate even more: Could this be the CIA Dog from El Cráneo Negro's past?
And finally, I just got word that the inexplicably beloved Bug died of a heart attack. What a wimp.
This is your typical consumer model throne. If you just want a cheap prop, it's fine. If you want to actually sit like a king, pony up the cash and get yourself a prosumer model. This entry level stuff is more for a duke or baron at best.
Do you wish to know what computers will be doing in the year to come? With a sigh I shall exert the minimal effort it takes to reveal all. Feel free to print out these predictions and share them with your friends via fax.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.
The seedy canine underworld of Shaggy Butte is explored in this hard-hitting series combining obsessive pet fanatics and crowd-sourced internet reviews.