This article is part of the CONEX Convict Connections series.
CONEX > D Block > For Sale > Peculiar Amusements
L@@K >>> nigga a real ass record u aint never heard before
Holla At: C-ZAR @ D Block on 4
Askin: Thick Sandy is gettin wore out i will trade if you got a fine ass mustache girl and sweeten that shit
Niggas word: IS BOND (10 in last 3 months)
YO CHECK THIS SHIT NIGGA. MEAN G THE GUARD WITH THE CRAZZY ASS SCAR UP ON HIS FACE JUST PASS ME A CARE PACKAGE FROM MY BLOOD LIPS DOIN 15 ON SOME PATRIOT ACT BULLSHIT. HE IN UNTERWELT THAT PAN EUROPE REPRO MAX THEY GOT UP BY JERSEY CITY. NIGGA SHIT ON A FLAG OR SOME SHIT, CLAIMIN IT WAS DARK AND HE DIDNT KNOW HE WAS SHITTIN ON A FLAG. ORIGINALLY WAS IN A SAMS CLUB MEDIUM SECURITY BUT THEY INMATE LIST GOT BOUGHT OUT BY PAN EUROPE MOVE HIS ASS TO UNTERWELT.
ANYWAY THAT SHITS ALL TERTIATING TO THE STORY WHICH IS CENTERED ON THAT CARE PACKAGE LIPS SENT UP. COURSE IT WAS ALL TORE UP AS USUAL BY CORRECTIONS TAKIN A NIGGAS SWISS CAKE ROLLS AND KNITTING NEEDLES A NIGGA USE FOR CROSS STITCH ON A BITCHS KIDNEYS. DONT EVEN LET A NIGGA FILE HIS NAILS WITH SHIT BUT AN EMRY BOARD.
MEAN G LEFT ME SOME WEIRD ASS RECORDS I GUESS LIPS BRIBED OUT OF THE PRISON LIBRARY AT UNTERWELT. FOLK SONGS AND SHIT AND LITTLE KIDS SONGS WITH LIKE SESAME STREET COUNTIN AND SHIT. MAY BE USEFUL TO A NIGGA IF YOU SO FUCKIN IGNORANT YALL DONT KNOW YOUR COUNTIN AND SUBTRACTIONS BUT A NIGGA CANT RUN GAME IF HE DONT KNOW THAT SHIT SO HOW YOU EVEN MAKE IT ON HERE, NIGGA?
I PUT THAT SHIT IN ANOTHER LOT ON CONEX FOR DUMBASS NIGGAS IF YOU WANT IT. THIS SHIT I GOT HERE IS PRIME SHIT. AINT NO WOODIE GUTHRY SHIT, AINT NO BING CROSBY. THIS SHIT AINT IN OUR LIBRARY. THIS SHIT IS REAL, DOG. THIS SHIT IS FUCKIN DON & SEYMOUR LAY IT ON A NIGGA.
YOU SEE THAT SHIT??? STRAIGHTLACED WHITEBREAD LAWRENCE O'DONNELL LOOKIN NIGGA DON DONE PAIR UP WITH A ALIEN. YOU SEE THAT SHIT NIGGA? LOOK LIKE A GIRAFFE OR SOME SHIT? THAT IS A FUCKIN ALIEN. AND A NIGGA SINGS SONGS ABOUT LAUNCHIN ROCKETS AND SHIT ALONG WITH SOME HILARIOUS ASS JOKES WILL CRACK A NIGGA UP. LIKE WHAT DO A NIGGAS NOSE AND FEET BOTH DO? GIVE UP NIGGA? RUN AND SMELL.
LAST THREE TRACKS ARE SCRATCHED UP ON THE RECORD SO IT JUST SKIPS ON "IT'S COMING" AND PLAYS "IT'S COMING" OVER AND OVER AGAIN. SOUNDS CREEPY "ITS COMING, ITS COMING, ITS COMING, ITS COMING" BUT ITS COOL THOUGH YOU JUST GOTTA GET UP AND FIX THE NEEDLE WHILE SEYMOUR IS REPEATIN ON THAT SHIT
it's hard to shake the feeling that I've always got five stars in this Grand Theft Auto known as life.
Now, inexplicably, season three is looming over us like some sort of dome. Season one's plot asked whether or not the town could get out from under the dome. Apparently the answer was "no". Season two asked "I guess we're really stuck, huh?" and the answer was "yup".
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.
The inmates of Lambspoke Penitentiary utilize the CONEX network to exchange goods, services, and rumors as things begin to go amiss at Lambspoke.