Ten years ago I buried a capsule in my E3 hole. It's a good hole. The capsule contained two items: My predictions for E3 2016 meticulously inked upon a weathered scroll, and a second-gen iPod Mini with just one song on its drive, Ignition (remix).
Today I dug up the capsule from the E3 hole. How accurate were my prophecies? I'm going to share them with you now. I will not share Ignition (remix). You should have had the foresight to bury a copy for yourself.
Gentle creature Mark Zuckerberg informs you that he enjoys his dog and wife the normal human amount. That he has a plan. That he will be Gentle Leader.
Afraid of ideas and free speech? Well then you better not read this article, coward.
Candles scented like Destiny planets - increases KDR by 26%!
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.