I'm going to take my pants off and slither under a pile of farty Pajama Jeans. Then I'm really gonna get this party started.
How many dads have gone through life never knowing they needed a kick-bitch? It's a human tragedy.
Forget Target or Best Buy, if you want deals this Black Friday you can't do better than smoking massive, mind-melting quantities of DMT.
A reluctant family is forced to welcome a non-human participant to Thanksgiving dinner.
You cant go around life being smart in an unconventional way, it could change the world.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.