WELL WELL WELL
WELL WELL WELL
LOOKS LIEKE EVARYBODYES FAVORITE HAX0R SI BACK AGAN!!!! AGINA!!! AGAINE!!! AGIAIN!!!! AGAIN!!!!
helo its me, Jeff K, runner of teh website "JEFF K'S WEBSIET" on my hoempaege! I haev been getting a lot of emale lately but luckaily I dont read any of it because I am a bussey person liek a BUG and I dont haev tiem too reads emale! Teh last two months I haev working vary hard to save up and buy a scootar so me and Jerry can go too teh scootar pork they just opened in Granatie Falls, but I cant save up for $100!!!! Jerry's mom got him one because if she dosant eat for a day then she saves up ovar ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS and that was just a drop in teh bucket for her, hahaha teh PIG SLOP BUCKET HAHAHA LORLROLRORL!!!!!! ROTGFLEGLFLE@!!!
So I haev been working a lots witch explanes why my absents has been felt around teh nation's worald. BUT I AM BACK AND I HAEV WRITTAN A NEW COLAMN FOR YUOR BARNBUCKETS TO READ! yes, I updated my "ASK JEFF K COLAMN" for tooday! In thes colamn I drop mean science and inform about teh latest happenings in teh PC computar game worald and HEY GABE NEWELL WHERES TF2 YUO GRAVY RANCHER???
I dont know where TF2 si, I guess Valve is too bussey makeing new box art for "HALF LIFE: EXPANSIAN PACK #2023930" where yuo gets too play Halg Life from teh perspectiave of a BLACK MESA URINAL CAKE!!!! wow way too go Gabe mayeb some day I can work for Valve and release Powerplay themed undurware for big and tall men across teh globe. But probaly not because then my mom would get made and throw me out a window liek in that movie where the guy gets throwned out a window!!! BUT ANYAWAYS;;;
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.