You won't have to wait until next Wednesday to find out what's going to happen on the next episode of South Park; thanks to our super-secret Hollywood connections, Something Awful has secured the first three pages of what will surely be another award-winning adventure in social commentary. Matt Stone and Trey Parker-you masters of American satire-we salute you!
Ferguson's long arm of the law laments the latest cutback.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.