This article is part of the Monstergeddon series.
Do you enjoy Worm Miller's signature brand of bullshit? What if we told you there were entire books full of it?! Check out the author that Publishers Weekly called "cavalier and distasteful" and "blatantly disrespectful!"
Obviously, the first thing necessary to getting back in shape is buying a bunch of expensive knick-knacks.
Finally, a look at the candidate's long-delayed tax returns.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.
Monstergeddon is an annual, one-night tournament of monsters competing in various categories -- Best Kill, Most Unnecessary Collateral Damage, Sexiest Victim -- with the top prize being the coveted Killer Cup. The objective of the tournament is killing humans.