|"The North conveyed the brief verbal message recently through its U.N. delegation in New York, saying North Korea appreciates Bush's letter and expects each side to keep its part of the agreement, a senior administration official said, speaking on condition of anonymity because he wasn't authorized to talk about the delegate diplomacy."|
Hooray! North Korea acknowledged receiving a letter from President Bush!
You know your relationship with a foreign power is on the rocks when you send them a diplomatic policy letter and they reply like a celebrity's assistant answering emails.
It is easy to imagine Bush hunt-and-pecking his way through a rambling letter at his computer about how he saw a TV show on the Korean war and now he feels like he really identifies with North Korea. He just pours his heart out into the letter. It hits about page five and he's starting in on how he knows if they ever met they would become friends and he tells North Korea if it's ever in America he would love to buy it a beer.
He finally gets up the nerve to send it and for the next couple days he keeps wondering if they got the letter and wondering if maybe he should send another one just to be sure. Just when he's about to do exactly that, one of his aides walks in to deliver the reply from North Korea. With barely-contained excitement he unfolds the letter and puts on his reading glasses.
Thanks for your letter!
President Bush's shoulders slump. His fantasy of making a connection with a new friend disappears as quickly as a Kennebunkport DUI arrest.
Maybe next time he can cut out the middleman and send an email with one of those annoying read-receipts.
|"NASA e-mails released Wednesday indicate the space agency was looking for ways to prevent astronaut meltdowns just three months before one-time shuttle flier Lisa Nowak was arrested in a scandalous love triangle."|
You can file this one under, "Stories guaranteed to confuse a cowboy."
I don't know if I can easily explain it to you, cowboy. You see, there is this thing called space and...well, all you really need to know is that the story it involves a love triangle, kidnapping, and diapers.
Oh, cowboy, you're so stupid.
You Will Read This Headline. Then You'll Laugh. Then You'll Realize You Were Wrong All Along.
'We’re going to be in trouble!' Little Sister wailed, clutching her favorite book to her chest and sobbing. 'This isn’t fun like a story anymore!' But Big Sister was not listening, she was thinking. She grabbed Little Sister’s book from her and ran into town, yelling 'Help! A book made me and my sister hurt someone!'
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.