From the makers of the award-winning Award Creator Deluxe comes the next step forward in computer generated poetry: Poetry Generator Pro! Now it's easier than ever to turn your favorite memories into actual poems - without the hassle of writing poetry yourself.

"It's Amazing!" says Quote Maker 2000, another piece of fine software created by us. "It blew my mind!" said Quote Maker 2000, this time about itself. "What can I say to keep people from leaving me all alone in this utility closet?" cried Quote Maker 2000 as we turned off the light and shut the soundproof door behind us.

How does Poetry Generator Pro work? It's simple. In the Input field, write a detailed scene from your life which you would like to be preserved as a poem, taking care to bold the most important words.

Input example:

Today I married Julian, my high school sweetheart. Our families shared this wonderful occasion with us. The ceremony was held on a beach. I am so happy to have this wonderful man as my husband.

Then hit the "Generate" button. Within hours you'll be rewarded with a poem specifically tailored to your scene:

Verily, doth [ERROR]
Boat car transportation
[CODE 48 MISSING]
Iambic pentameter
Why my sigh cry try
IP address sent to friend Thresher
You who do dew threw
Anti-war government nig
Poetry

The best part? Each poem is saved locally as a txt file. You can open it with a computer practically any time you want!

Try it with your family vacation!

Input example:

France is incredible. There is so much art, not just confined to the museums but seemingly bleeding through everywhere you look. On some level you already know that the region has a rich history and culture, but once you're actually here it's an eye-opening experience.

Generated poem:

Catch baseball
Die trying
[NO ERROR]
aaaaaagggg
Creator of Maus
Creator of Garbage Pail Kids
Same guy
Look it up
friend Thresher coming for harvest

You can even take a boring piece of stuffy old poetry and turn it into a real poem!

Input example:

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Generated poem:

There is no friend Thresher
It was a joke
Haha
Jokes
Humor
Et cetera
friend Thresher they are on to you
Move quickly friend while they sleep

Looking for a fun way to liven up your poems? Buy the Poetry Generator Pro Hot Dog Pack and your poems will be totally hot, dog! Ha ha. By that we mean each poem will feature hot dogs as a theme.

Input example:

Today I attended my cousin's funeral. We grew up together. He was my first close friend. I will miss him dearly. I'm not religious, but I yearn for an afterlife because the thought of him simply ceasing to exist is far too painful. It should have been me.

Generated poem:

Autoexec dot batman
Config dot sisqo
[HIDDEN THRESHER MESSAGE]
Himem dot sisqo
Sisqo dot batman
Hot dogs

Are you a professional with demanding poetry needs that simply cannot be met by Poetry Generator Pro? That's why we have developed Poetry Generator Pro: Enterprise Edition! Functionally identical to the standard edition in many ways, Enterprise Edition saves each outputted poem as not just one text file, but up to 3,000 copies of the same document!


– Dennis "Corin Tucker's Stalker" Farrell

More Front Page News

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.