Current job: Unemployed/The Mormon guy
Favorite Beatle: George
What kind of name is Mitt: It’s a pretty funny name.
Reasons to vote for Mitt Romney:
Current job: Congressman/Ross Perot 2: Why Do These Guys Always Have Big Ears?
Cows have: 4 stomachs
Number of Google results for "'Ron Paul' 'fucking lunatic'": 327
Reasons to vote for Ron Paul:
Mothers, Danzig warned you in general terms about his nefarious intentions. Now find out what he specifically intends.
Makes baby look too appetizing. Also I have my thigh stuck in one and I can't get it off. It's so tight around the skin I can't cut it without risking injury. IT'S A LONG STORY AND IT'S NONE OF YOUR BEESWAX.
The darkest, most controversial game since Luigi's Mansion.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.