Serial killers are the scariest people in the world, so one would assume they must have the scariest thoughts in the world as well. To test this theory, Something Awful asked several of history's worst mass murderers to tell us the scariest things they could think of. Be advised, their answers are not for the faint of heart.

Dennis Rader:

"A man in a top hat is eating a plate of maggots, and sometimes his head shakes really fast. Also, the room is lit by a swinging lightbulb, so the shadows are all weird."

 
 
 

Ed Gein:

"A creepy-looking doll opens its eyes."

 
 
 
 

Ted Bundy:

"You're in an attic and there's a lady in a wedding dress by the window. You walk up to her and she turns around and she's a skeleton. You try to scream but can't, because you're a skeleton too."

 
 

Henry Lee Lucas:

"An empty nursery. A phonograph is playing 'Row Your Boat' at the wrong speed. The word 'HELP' is written on the wall in blood, and the 'E' is backwards."

 
 
 

Joel Rifkin:

"A woman is brushing her hair while a dead girl crawls across the ceiling."

 
 
 
 

Gary Ridgway:

"Time-lapse shot of a dead squirrel, set to dark ambient music."

 
 
 
 

Albert Fish:

"Da Hip Hop Witch."

 
 
 
 
 

Dean Corll:

"You're running toward a door, but the door keeps getting farther away."

 
 
 
 

Donald Harvey:

"A jack in the box starts turning itself."

 
 
 
 
 

John Wayne Gacy:

"A Korn museum."

 
 
 
 
 
More Front Page News

This Week on Something Awful...

  • GLUT OF DOGS

    GLUT OF DOGS

    TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851

  • THE PERFECT HUMAN FORM

    THE PERFECT HUMAN FORM

    Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.

Copyright ©2016 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.