This article is part of the SXSW Guide / Anti-Guide series.
Toni K is Finland's prime authority on equatorial musics; you can hit him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/ToniKz.
THURSDAY, MARCH 15 10:00PM -10:40PM
FRIDAY, MARCH 16 8:45PM - 9:25PM
THE STAGE ON SIXTH PATIO
SATURDAY, MARCH 17 9:00PM -9:40PM
Quantic is a relentless dilettante: Since 2001 he has released some 10-15 albums under such a variety of names that I cannot keep an accurate count, and in a laughable variety of genres. He wisely abandoned the tedious nu-jazz of his early records for the tight (jazz-)funk and soul of The Quantic Soul Orchestra, but since relocating from sunny Brighton, England, to the stormy shores of Cali, Colombia, he has also included reggae, Afro-Cuban jazz stylings, salsa, cumbia and even afrobeat to the repertoire to his growing number of AKAs. And this is in addition to picking songs for a bunch of funk compilations and remixing stuff nigh-obsessively.
His next album will be out in April under the name of Quantic & Alice Russell with The Combo Bárbaro, and whatever band or project he's performing with, he'll be certain to blast you with Latin American pop culture quotes and references that you don't have the slightest hope of understanding or recognising. And that's the highest possible praise I can give.
ACL LIVE AT THE MOODY THEATER
FRIDAY, MARCH 16 10:30PM -11:10PM
AUDITORIUM SHORES STAGE (LADY BIRD LAKE)
SATURDAY, MARCH 17 4:00PM -4:40PM
Geographically Bomba Estéreo are from Bogotá, Colombia, while in the realm of hipster-approved electronic "world music" they're roughly third tier. Two steps removed from M.I.A., the epicentre, their career highlights have found them on the soundtrack to FIFA 10 and featured on Buraka Som Sistema's second album. Their captivating blend of cumbia rhythms with hip hop and reggaeton (in a good way) deserves more attention, though: "Fuego", with its manic singalong hook, rightly became an underground hit, but their cover of "Pump Up The Jam" (as "Ponte Bomb") is just as rude, and songs like "La Boquilla" and "La Niña Rica" feature what many come to Bomba's records for: house with accordions and bongos.
The Two Worst Folk Band Names Of SXSW 2012, And Their Music
CENTRAL PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH
FRIDAY, MARCH 16 8:30PM -9:10PM
achingly sincere; from Portland; their violinist has a ridiculous moustache and their cellist is a girl; there's a banjo. Truly awful.
Trampled by Turtles
CEDAR STREET COURTYARD
THURSDAY, MARCH 15 12:00AM -12:40AM
there's a banjo here too, and a fiddle, but they play with such energy and talent that I cannot mock it. If the singer was an Irish stereotype instead of some nasal-voiced American, I would genuinely like it.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
Were you enjoying your day? STOP! There is outrageous crap going on you need to know about!
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.
SA music writers point out cool bands to see at SXSW (or listen to at home, if you're not going). Also they warn about dumb bands you should avoid!