This book consists of ideas, images, & quotations hastily texted or tweeted to use them 4 future or 4 whatevs. Not 2 many get used for project cuz I am hella busy busy busy so mostly just ideas - suggestions or random $hit I just thought was interesting so that I don't forget them or maybe I can cum up with a better idea. The sources are various - dreams, TV shows I watched, songs I heard on my zune, my girls, TMZ, twitter, googles, & so on. lol all real & about my life tho......The REAL Tila Tequila
1 - Trying to fit Wifey into my dress - bizarre consequences.
2 - Glitter thong @ web store (evil?!?!)
3 - Woman w/ no panties takes mysterious car service 2 bar while on period - TMZ posts picture of tampon string & beefies LOL
4 - Wifey threw'd computer out oriel window, lands on ancient cobbled street of strange foggy village - dawn brings trip to Mac store.
5 - Andy Dick hatches from primordial egg.
6 - Exact same dress worn by fat bitch - wish for her tits 2 fall off mysteriously cums true
7 - Evil pharaoh makes barfing sounds from kitchen but when u go in there he acts like nothing happened WTF
8 - Sexy genius mogul lady invents new website where u can go on & put in a picture of ur dog & it will show what it looks like if it wuz a person - dogs trade places with people LOL driving dogs
8b - Tilasdoggypeeps.com
9 - Wifey saw a ghost & calls police to apartment - final warning from PD
10 - Zip line on spring break - wet t-shirt - evil melody about thongs makes whipped cream appear.
11 - 2 many margaritas - forgot about cooter pills - red cowboy boots guy - consequences.
12 - Evil laughter on La Cienega - HOLLYWOOD sign seen at full moon becomes LOLOLWOOF.
13 - Lady says a mean thing to Tila - sunbathing - big sea pickle bites a lady's cooter. YIKES!!!
14 - Sexy genius inventor invents dress with no butt - awards - vampire stripper
15 - Something unspeakable seen in STD test
16 - Wifey spills all her pills on the carpet - she knows stripper friends are coming over - desires big crying breakdown when we're trying to have fun LOL DRAAAAAMA
17 - Normal man wins Shot at Love with terrible climax
18 - LOL miscarriage in Starbucks toilet cums back & keeps getting bigger and bigger & talks in a whispery voice
19 - Wifey hears strange music on myspace - throws meth fit - STFU
20 - Fat baby gets beat up, tweets out of turn, cries - evil fatso baby
21 - dog Brazilian - consequences
22 - tampon goes into D&G purse and cums out bloody lol
These sponges will make your hair WHITE and your teeth CURLY.
If you get these jokes, you KNOW you're smart!
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.